There was once a little girl who had an older half sister, an older half brother, and a little sister. Even at an early age these siblings were thin while this little girl was chunky. From an early age she heard how fat she was and that no one would ever like her.
The little girls parents fought constantly making their children pick sides. See these parents did not have many friends so they turned to their children in order to justify their actions and vent to. What they didn't understand that while making their children choose sides they were putting up barriers with their children; causing their children to hate the other side. Now, oddly enough even the oldest children were forced to choose sides. You would think that they would choose their mother and not their step father, but oddly enough the brother went to the dad's while the sister went to the mom's side.
While the older children were back and forth from their father's house. The younger two were forced to deal with the yelling matches on a daily basis. The only break was when they went to the babysitters. These babysitters were wonderful the older couple were awesome with a big back yard who spent time with each of the children showing their love and appreciation and making sure everyone got one on one time. But, then came that evil child who was a biter. Then they had to depart to another babysitter. Who had so many children in her care that it was all she could do from screaming at them and putting them in the corner every day.
It was at that babysitter's that the little girl was tormented for being fat. The babysitter's sons were constantly telling the little girl how fat she was in 1st grade this is not a good thing. Then the little girl's sister over heard and she started it at home. At about this time the older brother moved into the house permanently.
The situation at home was the mother was very ill because of her asthma she was on steroids in order to prevent attacks. The mother was one of 17 children who was abused mentally and physically as a child. She had many mental demons that she had not taken care of from early on in life and felt the need to over control her children. The mother had decided at one point it would be a great idea to rip her children from their home and take them to their aunts. The little girl was never quite sure why her mother had left her father yet she had to go. She was so mad though that her mother would take her from her daddy. Her daddy was the only one who understood her. He loved her while her mother only loved her younger sister.
Why, would her mother take her? She constantly yelled at her, hit her. As a second grader it was hard to know already at that young age that her sister was preferred over her. The separation only lasted a few days.
While this family lived in the country with not many children surrounding them. The little girl had a best friend. Danny was the best friend anyone could have, he played all the time at the house. Danny had his own demons at home with a father who was an alcoholic. He never quite understood what the little girl's issue was with at home. At least her dad wasn't beating her. But, what Danny did not know was that her brother was allowing his friends to take bath's with her, forcing her to give them oral sex and basically have their way with her minus actually having sex. He always stopped it there it was too far he would say.
This little girl was tormented at home; with a mother who preferred her younger sister, a brother who was allowing horrible things to happen to his sister, the only break was Danny and her father who tried to show his daughter love. However, the father was mentally abused as a child and it was really hard to show his children love in a proper manner and always chose sarcastic humor to show it. This was the major problem between the parents. The mom always thought she was being mentally abused which caused even more fighting.
School wasn't much of a better situation the little children were constantly making fun of the little girl telling her how much she looked like a fat little boy with her short hair. She tried so hard to make friends, she had her few friends sure, but nothing to significant. Then Danny moved away in fifth grade and she was on her own, with defending the older boys at home from touching her.
One day in the fifth grade, the little girl and her sister get off the bus and find her mother and aunt in the car with it packed they were told to get into the car. The question of where are we going was asked and was told that they were going on a trip. Now, this was just weird for the little girl Dad would never stay home on a vacation. She got really upset and started crying she knew something was wrong. However, she got into the car crying wanting her daddy. They drove for hours and finally stopped at a hotel while still being told their dad was going to meet them at their destination.
Half way through Utah the little girl was told that her mother was leaving her father. The reason; the little girl was too angry and out of control. Something had to be done! They were going to their aunts in Texas so she could get the little girl under control. They got to their aunts who was very nice but very strict. She told the mother she didn't understand why she thought the little girl was out of control she seemed so calm. See what the mother didn't understand was that it wasn't the little girl out of control. It was the mother who did not know how discipline with love and care. She lost her temper which in control made the little girl get very mad and feel so unloved.
Mean while the little girls father hired a private dectitive. See, one of the mothers friends felt bad about what was happening. I mean to watch a father of 2 come home find his house empty at 3 am and a note on the kitchen counter. It was really hard and she finally gave in and told him where the wife was. So, the father filed for temproarily custody. Winning it the mother was passed the on the message that if she was caught out of state with the children she would be arrested for kidnapping. When she realized that the father knew where they were she went to a women's shelter where she lied and told them that the father of her children was abusive and hit her. What she did not realize was that her oldest daughter who loved her father more then anything was standing in the door way hearing the lies. Of course the little girl just got angrier and angrier.
They stayed at the shelter for a few weeks and the children got enrolled in school. But, then the mother heard that she was on the run from the law. She took her kids and got on a bus and went back to Oregon. They stayed with one of her nephews and then went to a shelter there. The little girls father showed up on a rainy Halloween night. She was so ecstatic she got her father again. The parents stayed separated until around the Christmas holidays when the mother returned home. The entire family was put into counseling. The little girl was told that her anger issues was not with her mother but with herself. She was angry for being fat and had no self esteem and was put on a diet by the counselor.
The little girl refused to go back to the counselor but became angrier. Physical fights started between her and her mother. Bruises were left on the little girl one day. It was that day that her father finally stood up and told her mother that she was not allowed to lay a hand on his children again. If spankings were in order they were to wait until he got home. See the problem with that was that the mother would just loose her temper and a lot of times the father did not agree with what the mother thought. O this little girl thought she could do no wrong now. Her resentment toward her mother just grew and grew.
In high school, this girl was finally starting to make good friends. Parents were split up again. But she had friends she could turn to. While she still faced her demons from her childhood and her low self esteem she tried to hide it as best she could. But, then she learned the pleasure of pain. Pain made all the anger go away. The lack of control, the anger it disappeared for a few minutes. She started cutting. Knives, razor blades, or if she was at school she would have her friend bite her. That was the thing with her group they all understood.
The parents got back together and the fighting resumed between the mother and daughter and the father and mother. The girl just kept cutting no one knew what was going on. She was smart and did it where she wouldn't be caught. But, then came that TV movie about cutting where the girl on the movie almost died because she cut too deep. It was at this time that the girl decided that she needed to tell her parents.
The only other person who knew was this guy in Utah who she accidentally started messaging with. It was fate that brought them together. To this day that man does not realize that with out him the little girl would of probably killed herself or ended off in a way worse situation then she is now. While, the mother just told her to stop and that she was just trying to get attention the father realized that something was seriously wrong with his daughter. He got her into emergency counseling and found a permanent counselor. The girl went for a year or so.
This girl while now a woman still has issues with self esteem and thinking she is worthless. Now, has a some what stable relationship with her mother. Once the mother remarried and moved out they were able to recognize that they were both wrong while the little girl was growing up. The father and daughter are still very close, there is a small wedge with the new step mother, but they both manage to over come it. The girl finds men who just give her attention as a good thing what else can she expect she after all is a fat unhappy woman. The cutting has stopped for the most part of course there are slip ups. But, over all the woman is working on being happy and trying to make life a better place.